Susan sat at her desk, or rather, the desk she was currently using, with her brow furrowed. When Michael had suggested she fill in as his secretary, it had seemed like an excellent idea. She'd be able to make a bit of money and spend more time with her very busy boyfriend. In fact, she'd been so pleased with the opportunity that her desire to show Michael her appreciation had nearly made them run late that morning.

She'd discovered once they arrived at the Ministry, however, that Michael the boyfriend and Michael the boss were rather different individuals. Michael the boyfriend was patient and sweet, very much a gentleman. Michael the boss was -- well, not exactly those things. Not that Susan had expected him to behave the way he did when they were alone, this was a place of business after all, but common courtesies such as saying 'please' or 'thank you' seemed to completely fall by the wayside the moment he'd passed through the front doors. He'd even snapped at her a few times for some thing or another, giving her no leeway for being new to the tasks he demanded of her.

Truth be told, Susan could see why Michael had such a difficult time keeping an assistant. Even she was getting rather put out with him.



***
Michael sat in his office immersed in a stack of ancient parchments with runes that had to be translated by yesterday, his superior had said. He thanked Merlin that Susan had offered to fill in as his secretary until a new one could be found. Susan would certainly not be like those other nitwits, all of whom were worthless as help. They were all fine when he was out of the country and corresponding by owl, but the minute he set foot back into his office, they cried, or left, or in the case of that redhead of two weeks ago, stormed out and told him in no uncertain terms where he could shove the Mermish Treatise scrolls from 1968.

Michael thought it likely that the assistant's desk in the outer office was cursed.

He scribbled a brief note on a scrap of parchment to have someone from the Department of Spells and Curses take care of it; after all, he didn't want a cursed desk to hurt his girlfriend. Also mention it to Susan so she's aware, he added mentally, all the while trying to translate as quickly as he could.

He needed quiet for these most ancient of the druid languages, the minute he was interrupted, he lost the thread and had to start all over. It was part of the magic interwoven within the language; that's what had made it all but unreadable for hundreds of years. He, under Dumbledore's tutelage, had unlocked the key to it, and was the only wizard in Europe who had the ability to do what he was currently in the process of. He almost had this passage; his quill was moving as quickly as he could, but there was noise. There was noise, and he almost had it.

And then it was gone. Because of the noise.

"Bugger all! What?!" he shouted, throwing down his quill and making an ink splatter all over the desk. "Damn it," he growled, looking up, surprised to find Susan standing there, with the same look on her face that the cute little blonde from last week had before she burst into tears.

Damn cursed desk, he thought, while trying to mop up the mess he'd made. An hour and a half of work wasted. He sighed disgustedly, and looked up at Susan. "Did you need something?"

Susan bit her lip nervously, raising an eyebrow at the man who looked like her lovely Michael, but wasn't acting at all like the caring, sweet boyfriend with whom she'd started the day. She was half-tempted to pull her wand see if Riddikulus had any effect on him. Giving her head a shake, she stepped further into his office and held out the planner and parchments she'd brought in.

"I updated your schedule with the visits next week by the Swiss and Japanese delegates. There's a memo from Invisibility Task Force about some scrolls found by a group of Muggle archaeologists in the Middle East recently. They want you to investigate whether the scrolls are of magical origin." There was something else. "Oh, and I wanted to remind you of your meeting at two o'clock."

"Is that it?" he asked tersely and sat back, crossing his arms over his chest and looking at the runes he'd almost finished. "Damn it." He exhaled heavily and picked up his quill, sending his head down over the parchment one more time. She was silent, so he looked up at her. He had to get these done, and her standing there would be fruitless. She needed to go. She'd make noise. "Well?" he asked a little louder, in case she hadn't heard him clearly. "Is it?"

He was worse than Professor Snape! The gall! She could feel the heat rising in her face, and for once it hadn't the slightest thing to do with being shy or embarrassed. Placing her hands on her hips, Susan scowled at him. There was no reason for him to be rude. She'd completed the jobs he'd assigned her and now he was going to raise his voice and curse at her? The coldness in her voice should have put frost on his window. "Yes. That is it. 'It' being the last time you speak to me in that manner. I am not a house-elf, Michael."

He looked up at her and blinked several times. She was clearly angry. Like redheaded secretary had been. She actually looked a lot like his mum did when she was brassed off, and that was never a good thing. He put his quill down and frowned. "Susan?" he asked in what he sincerely hoped was a soothing voice. "What's wrong, love?"

Was he joking? "What's... What's wrong?" she asked, incredulous. He couldn't possibly be unaware of how he'd treated her all morning. No one could be that oblivious to his own actions. "Do you mean what's wrong aside from the fact that you've been behaving like a prat since we got to the office? Snapping and cursing! Even Professor Snape said 'please' once in awhile! What in the world has gotten into you?"

Susan is yelling at me. Why is Susan yelling at me? Michael thought, dumbstruck. "Was I snapping at you? I certainly didn't mean to," he said, going to her and taking her hand. "And I know I wasn't swearing at you," he continued, concern etching his features. "I would never. It's just that these," he said, gesturing to the stacks of parchment, "are tricky." He explained what was so difficult about the runes he's been working on, and when she didn't answer, he craned his neck to look her in the eye. "My sincere apologies if I was terse. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry I interrupted you," she said, still frowning a bit. "If you'd told me you were working on something and you needed not to be disturbed, I'd have stayed out." Deciding that she may as well do her best to help the next secretary that was brought in, she cleared her throat and looked at Michael seriously. "I adore you, Michael, but if you speak to me rudely again I'll hex you once we leave the office. You'd hang on to secretaries a bit longer if you made an effort to be civil."

He looked at her incredulously. "You can't mean it's me? Surely... not." He walked over and motioned out the open office door. "The desk, perhaps? Or them..." he trailed off, seeing Susan's skeptical expression. "No?" he asked her, genuinely confused. "It's me?" he asked this time, with a horrified expression.

"I briefly wondered if you'd left the office without my noticing and I'd actually walked in on a boggart," she replied, her face softening as she realized he truly was just oblivious to how he'd been acting. She was still a little irritated with his behavior, but mostly she was relieved to have her Michael back. Lifting their joined hands, she pressed a quick kiss to his knuckles. "I'm sure you don't intend to be nasty, but you can be a bit of a beast when you're working. Just make sure you tell your assistant - politely - that you need quiet for certain tasks and that you can't be disturbed until you've completed them. It will save you and human resources a lot of headaches."

Michael sat down on the edge of his desk, staring at the open door again. "I can't believe it. All those girls. Redheaded Secretary. Brunette Secretary. Blonde, Crying Secretary..." He looked back at Susan. "You. Oh, dear. Should I send a note of apology? The Redheaded Secretary was really good. I'd like to get her back."

He looked so forlorn, she wanted to hug him. Probably not appropriate while he was her supervisor. With an affectionate smirk, she said, "I'd recommend actually getting her name if you do plan to send a note. 'Dear Redheaded Former Secretary' is not likely to win you any brownie points."

"Right," he replied, somewhat abashed. "I will." Pulling her into a hug, he asked, "You'll forgive me, then?"

"Of course. How could I resist?" Susan returned with a sweet smile. She leaned her head against his chest for a moment before pulling away. "Oh, I forgot to mention earlier that I'll be staying at my house tonight. Should make it easier to arrive on time tomorrow," she said with a wink.

"At your house?" he asked. "But you've forgiven me," he said, giving her a squeeze. "If you came to my place tonight, I could show you how very sorry I really am."

A faint blush rose in her cheeks and she giggled. "As much as I'm sure I would enjoy your penance, I can't come tonight. Draco's stopping by and I'm not sure how long he'll be at the house."

"Malfoy's coming by your house?" He stepped back slightly. "Would it be out of line to ask why?"

"You're cute when you're jealous, you know?" Susan took Michael's hands and pulled them around her again. "I asked him to come out and check my wards, suggest improvements, that sort of thing. Justin says he's really knowledgeable about them, and since I'm living alone again and certain nefarious characters are still on the loose, I just wanted to feel a little more secure."

"Ah. Okay." He frowned. "That doesn't make me feel any better, somehow."

Susan blinked up at him, a little shocked. "You know he's seeing Ginny Weasley, Michael. He's not out to get in my knickers. Even if he were, do you honestly think I'd let him? I think I've been pretty clear about where my affections lie."

Oh, shite. "No, Susan. I don't doubt you. Never," he said. "I guess I'm not that cute when I'm jealous, huh?"

Looking him over, Susan shrugged with a wry smile. "You're pretty cute all the time. I've learned to accept that right along with the fact that I'm incapable of coherent speech whenever your lips touch my neck, and that I enjoy seeing you naked far more than a good Hufflepuff girl should. So, given these truths, I'm glad to hear you don't doubt me." She held him more snugly and sighed. "Now, you wouldn't want me all alone with poor home security, right?"

Yeah, and I don't want you home alone with the guy fixing your home security, either, he thought. He flshed Susan a smile. "Of course I don't. If Gin says he's okay, he's okay." Michael eyed the pile of parchment on his desk. "Now, love, I really have to do these. How about you give me two hours, and then I'll take you to lunch?"

Susan pulled reluctantly away from him. "Alright, that sounds like an excellent plan. I'll be sure no one bothers you until you've finished, Mr. Corner."

He reached over and smacked her lightly on the bottom. At her startled expression, he grinned sheepishly. "I just figured I'd never get another chance to swat my secretary on the bum and not get hexed for it."

"Yes, keep that in mind if you manage to get Redheaded Secretary back. Even if she didn't hex you, Girlfriend Secretary certainly would," she teased.

Giving him a smile, she left him to his translation.

{Summary: Susan tells Michael exactly why all of his secretaries left. Basically, it's that he's a giant, throbbing arse.}