Theodore walking into the dining room Thursday morning, unhappy and unrested. He wasn't able to sleep without Tracey very well.

Sighing, he saw her. Tracey's back was to the door and he was surprised to see her up so early. In fact, he was surprised she was downstairs eating breakfast at all, she knew what time he had to get up for work. She looked as elegant and beautiful as always, if a bit tired. She didn't look at him, making him feel both uneasy and a bit hurt as he sat down at the table beside her.

"Good morning," he said to her, his voice calm and steady.

"Good morning, Theodore." she said quietly, not looking up from her kedgeree but not ignoring him either. "Did you sleep well?" Her eyes lifted and she saw a tired looking Theo. She didn't know why she asked such an asinine question, but she honestly wanted to know. She'd had a dreadful night. It seemed that having him beside her all week had made her grow accustomed to being in his arms at night.

He cringed. It was like she knew he didn't sleep well without her close to him now. "No. I didn't sleep well at all," he said truthfully, putting pepper on the plate that a house-elf had slid in front of him. He hated the damned elves. They were everywhere, and it bugged him.

"If the bed is uncomfortable, tell the elves to get you another. Your work is too important to have you unrested." Tracey could tell the feeling in the room had become strained. She played with her napkin trying to find another thing to say to him, anything to say to him so she wouldn't have to get up and leave him, but she couldn't. Her mind was so muddled from the lack of sleep. She was about to slide back from the table when she remembered, "I'm sorry about Greg. I want to you know I didn't ask him to do that. I would never have."

Theo paused, a bit surprised. "There's no reason to be sorry for that," he said, "He just cares about you. I can understand that." He ate a bite and chewed thoughtful before saying, "And it's not the bed that's uncomfortable, Tracey."

She had been about to mention the howler she had planned for that friend who just 'cared about her', but his last sentence threw her. "I- er, well, if you need anything please let the elves know." She looked down again before standing up and pushing the chair back.

"I'll be fine," he said, "I hope I'm not making you run from the room," he added in a soft voice. This was her house after all. He shouldn't be making her uncomfortable in her own damn house.

She stopped. Her heart flipped. "You're not making me run from the room, Theo," she said with her firstm real smile in what seemed like days It was soft and small, but it was a smile. "I'm not much company for you, I'm afraid. Not feeling particularly witty or amusing. I shouldn't impose upon your breakfast. Besides, I'm finished." Tracey moved toward the door without turning from him. She'd almost backed out the door before adding quietly, "You missed part of the bruise. It's above your eye. The charm must not have caught it." She ducked her head and walked through the door. I hope he notices that I was looking so closely, she sighed as she walked up the stairs and into her bedroom.

Theo sighed, his hand automatically reaching up to touch the part of the bruise he had missed. The pressure stung. He finished his breakfast as quickly as he could and grabbed his empty plate as well as Tracey's and walked them into the kitchen, getting a dirty look for a few house-elves who had been waiting to clear the table. When he reached the Blue Room, he sighed again. This was not his room.

He turned back around and headed down the hall toward Tracey's room, knocking on the door.

It had to be him. The elves wouldn't bother knocking, they would have barged right in, probably making her feel guilty for leaving 'Poor Master Nott' in the dining room. Tracey had been standing at the window looking out into the gardens. She didn't move, only turned toward the door. "Come in, Theodore."

Theodore opened the door, not even surprised she knew it was him. He could see her on the far side of her room by the window. She looked so stately, so calm. It was all he could do not to walk to her and pull her into an embrace, but he held off. He just had to tell her. Then he'd be able to go. "Tracey, I just wanted to say... I'm sorry." He looked at her face. "I'm so sorry for hurting you. I can't take back what happened, but you have to know I would never hurt you on purpose." He stopped. He still had too much pride to beg her, to truly beg on his knees. He turned back around, intent to leave it at that, it was over. Her green eyes showed no hint of giving in, no real understanding or accepting of his apology. He wasn't a man to just apologize -- he only apologized when he meant it.

She let him walk out. She knew what saying that had cost him, but she let him walk out anyway. She couldn't voice what she was feeling and he hadn't stayed long enough to try to find out.

Theodore dropped the only bag he had on his bed. Clothes from the wardrobe were tossed into the bag haphazardly. He didn't even bother with magic. When he heard the door creak from behind him, he glanced back and saw a house-elf poked its head in and then leave again. He was dreading showing up on his mother's doorstep with his bag asking her for a place to stay until he could find a flat for himself. He could already hear her say, "Now what happened with that Miss Davis? I thought she was your girlfriend. What happened, Theodore Nott? How did you muck that up?" She'd be caring, but if he told her the truth she'd probably threaten to Avada Kedavra him herself. "Respect women, Theodore Nott. You are supposed to respect women!". But she'd take him in. She'd be disappointed in him, perhaps even mad at him, but she'd never let her son live out on the street. Theodore surveyed the room, sighing. He'd only been there a week and it had always intended on being temporary, but this was not the way he wanted to leave this house.

Tracey had slumped down on her bed after he'd left. He'd said he was sorry. He hadn't meant to hurt her. The words didn't stop the hurt, but it made her want to go to him, have him hold her. But she couldn't. She couldn't do that to herself. He would tire of her. He didn't want her. He couldn't possibly want someone like her. She was nothing like Pansy. She was nothing like Su. It didn't take a Seer to know that he'd seen her once too. There was nothing special about her that would ever make him stay and he'd already broken her heart, she wasn't willing to let him do it again and again.

A house-elf pushed open Tracey's bedroom door, practically screaming in panic. "Master Nott is packing his things. Master Nott is leaving!"

Tracey's eyes grew wide and she nearly fell off the bed. He's leaving? He can't leave. I can't let him leave. She was irrational clearly, since she'd just been thinking about how miserable she was and how things were well and truly over for them. She all but ran out of the room to see Theo walk out of the blue room with his bag. He looked so beaten down. Miserable. She couldn't let him look like that. Her heart was broken, but she had forgotten there was another heart involved, no matter how much she denied how he felt.

"Don't go." It was simple. Quiet and simple. "Please, don't leave," she said softly, the tears finally reaching her eyes. He couldn't leave.

Theo stared at her, hating the tears in her eyes. He felt broken, like he was weighted down by his guilt and pride until he had broke in half. "I don't want hurt you anymore," he said back, his voice surprising him by its strength. He took a few tentative steps forward until all he had to do was reach out to pull her into his arms. She didn't move away, and she didn't say anything. Slowly, gently, he pulled her into the circle of his arms. "I'm so sorry, Tracey. I never meant to hurt you," he whispered into her hair.

She began sobbing now. That same familiar smell that comforted her as it surrounded her as he held her in his arms. She had never wanted to cry in front of him. She'd been strong and cool, but having him hold her tightly made it all come out. "Please don't go, Theo. I'm sorry," she cried into his shoulder.

He stroked her hair, unsure what to do. "Don't say you're sorry," he said gently, "Please don't say you're sorry." It was a plea, but he wasn't sure she'd hear the pleading in his voice. He hated when women cried, always did, but this -- having Tracey cry on his shoulder because of him -- felt like someone was twisting the knife that had been stuck in his heart since Tuesday night. It was all too hard. He couldn't go on living in this house, with his woman, and not be with her. He couldn't pretend he didn't care for her, didn't love her like he did. He just couldn't live a lie.

"It's my fault," she sniffled, wiping her own eyes and looking at him. "This shouldn't matter. Why did I let it matter? I'm not as strong as she is. I should have let it go." It was completely unladylike to cry like this and was even more so to wipe her nose on her sleeve, but she couldn't stop, not when it was something that mattered this much to her. He'd always mattered this much to her. It was probably time that she told him things like that. She could see how a supreme lack of communication had caused most of their problems. "I don't want you to leave. I just can't have you here the way I did... not yet anyway," she said quietly, much braver than she was feeling. "Will you please stay with me?" She turned her puffy eyes to him for a second before tilting her head down, waiting for his answer.

He reached down and tilted her chin so she was looking at him. "Not strong as who?" he asked, ignoring what else she had said. He could address that in a minute.

Tracey shook her head, moving her chin away so she could look down again. "Someone like Pansy," she whispered in a strained voice.

Theo wanted to laugh. Does she really think I want Pansy? "Tracey, you don't have to be strong. You don't have to be anything but you," he whispered instead. Insulting her friend wasn't something he was ready to do... would ever want to do.

How could she have almost buggered this up? He was so kind and gentle with her and it was so clear that he wasn't playing a joke on her, that he hadn't lied when he'd told her how he'd felt about her. He'd never been the wicked kind. Never been someone who plotted to hurt others. Why had she been so ready to believe that he'd only been toying with her?

"I've loved you my whole life," she said simply. "I never told you that, but I wanted to make sure you knew. Since we were children, I think... though I didn't know it until we were older." It was easy to confess what everyone else had known once she had started. "I thought after you lost your father than I'd lost my chance forever, but I never stopped hoping, Theodore. And then I saw you walk out of that meeting." She stayed silent for a while, thinking over the next thing she wanted to say. "I don't think this would have hurt so much if it hadn't been the man I've loved all my life. I'm sorry I did that to you."

Theo just stared at her. He wanted to kiss her, to wrap his arms tightly around her and pull her as close as he could. To show her he loved her now. He might not have loved her all his life, but he sure as hell loved now. Would that be enough for her?

"Hearing you call me Theodore makes me feel like you're still mad at me. It's Theo, love." He pulled her close, stroking her hair again as she buried her face in his shoulder. "I love you, Tracey. I don't want to hurt you. Just tell me, promise me, my staying here won't hurt you any further."

She pulled her face back and looked him in the eyes. "I don't want you to go, Theo. Please don't leave," she said seriously.

Looking into her green eyes he fought the urge to kiss her. "I won't go," he whispered, his heart was still broken. He wanted to go; he wanted to stop seeing the pain in her eyes, to not have to live a lie. To not have to live in a separate room when she was just down the hall. He didn't like this. Running away had never been his style, though.

As if reading his thoughts, Tracey called for a house-elf, "Artanis, come please." A tall, stately looking creature appeared before them in the hallway. "Take Theo's bag back to our bedroom please." Turning to Theodore, she reached out for his hand. "You'll be late for work at this rate."

He grabbed her hand, enjoying the warmth. The warmth coming from her -- in more ways than just body heat. She was still hurt, but she was trying. That's all he could ask for. He tugged her a bit to him and kissed her chastely on the lips. Quick, simple. He smiled at her. "I owled in. Applegate knows I'll be late." He paused. "Are you sure you want me to move back into your room? Things won't be the same..."

"That's a good thing, Theo. Things weren't good. They seemed good, but now they can be better. If we go slower." She turned to walk down the hallway but stopped and turned back to him. Raising her arms around his shoulders, she hugged him tightly pulling back to kiss him soundly. He seemed a bit startled but didn't pull away. "And yes, I'm sure. I can't sleep at all without you there. Look at me, I look like rubbish and it's only been 2 days."

He reached up and cupped her face in his eyes, looking to her eyes. "You look beautiful, Tracey. You always look beautiful." He leaned down and kissed her again, sliding his tongue between her parted lips and tasting her briefly before pulling away. "I can do slow, Tracey. Take along as you need."

Reaching for her hand again, they walked back to Tracey's bedroom, the house elf following them excitedly. Tracey said she'd have the house elves put his things away, and he reluctantly agreed, hating to use the house elves more than truly necessary. He had learned the pride of doing the housework and cooking on his own. He turned to her, "Can you do be a favour and tell the house elves not to cook tonight? I'd love to cook you a home-made dinner."

She agreed happily, but seemed rather surprised. He didn't kiss her goodbye, feeling it might be too much too soon for her. Counting his lucky stars, he walked into his office 30 minutes late. Applegate wasn't sitting at his desk, but instead he was at Theo's desk. "What are you doing?" Theo asked his assistant, his happiness of the morning with Tracey washing away completely.

The small man jumped. "I thought you were going to be late."

"I am late," he said, crossing his arms over his chest and staring at the man with narrowed eyes.

"I was just looking for the paperwork on the new Silence Charm they are testing," the man said moving from behind his boss' desk.

"I don't have it," Theo said curtly, glaring at him. "And even if I did, next time, wait for me to come in and do not ever go through my desk again."

"Are you hiding something?"

"No. But it's my desk. I don't go through yours."

"I have nothing to hide. Go ahead."

"Applegate, just go down to the lab and find the paperwork, because I don't have it." Theo said angrily, moving behind his desk and surveying it. Nothing was moved. Nothing was mucked up.

Applegate muttered to himself as he left the office. Theo just shook his head. The paperwork hadn't come to him yet, or he would have passed it to Applegate. Stupid bugger, he thought dropping down in his seat to get to work.